Ready or not…starting over

The first few months are the hardest, especially the holidays.  Make room for a flood of emotions and decide if you’re the type of person who would rather be alone, or if you need someone with you when you’re down.

Let your family and friends know what you prefer and encourage them to respect your decision.  You may need to take a trip to get away from the familiar.  Whatever it takes, do it for yourself.

Look on Google for small groups for grief and loss and specify your area.  There are many groups to choose from and probably one close to you.

One day you will wake up and realize it’s time to make some decisions about your new single life.  You may have children and grandchildren who tend to see you only in your role to them, but that’s not your complete self-identity.  You’ll always be “Mom” and “Grandma”, but you’re still   ___(your name)________________.

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We sold our home and moved into a Senior apartment just months before my husband passed away.  It seemed right at the time when he was so very sick, but after he passed I resented being “dumped off” in the middle of old people, especially the widows.

I cried out to God one day, “Really?  This is what you have for me?  You dumped me off in this old people’s apartments!  Now what am I supposed to do?”

Little by little I became acquainted with some very lovely women who are in financial straits.  They come from every walk of life: professionals, singles, divorced, and widowed.

One day a phrase was dropped into my heart, like a spider dropping down from his web.  “Widow’s Purse” I heard.  I felt a flutter in my heart when the idea resonated with me.  I knew my “widow’s purse” was straining to make ends meet, and knew innately that other widows were suffering as much or more.

God had given me a new purpose.  Each of us has a purpose and they’re seasonal, I’ve discovered.  A time for being a bride, a mother, a grandmother, a wife, and more.  When your husband passes your main purpose is gone. You no longer have a sounding board, a sparring partner, a forever friend.  You look around and everyone is occupied with their purposes, and you don’t fit in.  That’s a terrible shock.

But trust me on this, God knows and still has a plan for you, a plan for good and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. (Jer. 29:11).

Ask and you will receive.  I promise.

Thank you, Lord, for Widows’ Purse.  You are using it to bless many widows.